Good is bad, bad is good; Big Bird and Big Brother

Last month, Mark Felt, former Assistant Director of the FBI admitted to being “Deepthroat,” the high-level Justice Department official who was the secret background source for the Watergate stories in the Washington Post in the early 1970’s that eventually pressured President Richard Nixon to resign.

Nixon didn’t just want to win re-election in 1972, this time he wanted to win big, so that he could claim a mandate.

Burglars broke into the headquarters of the Democratic National Committee in the Watergate office building in order to know the Democrats' strategies. They wanted to plant bugs, and they wanted to dig up dirt on the Democratic candidates in order to discredit them.

Thanks to the Post’s investigative reporting by Carl Bernstien and Bob Woodward, was only part of a much bigger campaign of intimidation, corruption, and “dirty tricks.”

Nixon seemed to have thought that because he was the President, he was somehow “above the law.” But the whole point of the United States is to be a governed not by men or political parties, but by laws and regulations.

Felt (Deepthroat) should’ve been lauded as a hero, but instead the mainstream media (not just Fox News, mind you, but all the networks and CNN) brought out all the President’s men instead, who proceeded to slander Felt’s character as someone who broke the law and violated the trust of his superiors.

Hello? Who broke the law? Who violated the trust of the American people? Chief among these Nixon defenders was Charles Colson. Colson is now a Conservative-Christian pundit who founded a prison fellowship ministry, but for Colson to portray Felt as some kind of sinner is the ultimate in hypocrisy.

I think that instead of the “love your enemies, pray for those who persecute you…turn the other cheek, go the extra mile, give them the shirt off your back (Matthew 5)” theology of Jesus and ‘the Bible,’ Colson subscribes more to the “the ends justifies the means” doctrine of Machiavelli’s ‘the Prince.’ Nixon’s followers believed that they were the only people morally qualified to control the country, therefore it didn’t matter what they did to guarantee that they remained in power.

Things haven’t changed much in thirty years. Last week the Republican controlled Congress decided to cut funding for the Corporation of Public Broadcasting (CPB) by 46%. That means that “Sesame Street” may be on the chopping block. Some PBS stations won’t be able to offer local programming, like the “Market to Market” and Iowa State Fair coverage we enjoy on IPTV, a few stations may shut down entirely.

Why? Because some Republicans don’t like it when PBS and NPR news programs fail to report on Bush policies in the most favorable light possible. Public broadcasting was created to be an objective, independent agency that is free both from political pressures and from commercial pressures of ratings. There motto used to be “If public television doesn’t do it, who will?”
Like Woodward and Bernstien at the Post, public tv and radio should take a skeptical and challenging position toward any administration, Republican or Democrat. That’s what a free press is for.

But first Bush made Kenneth Tomlinson chairman of the CPB, a man who spent $10,000 to scrutinize the content of “Now,” a PBS news magazine hosted by Bill Moyers, because he didn’t think Moyers was “Fair and balanced” enough. Of course, to Tomlinson (like for Sean Hanity and Rush Limbaugh) “fair and balanced” means biased in favor of the Bush Whitehouse.
Tomlinson would’ve loved to make PBS stand for the “Propaganda Broadcasting System.” Who is Bush nominating to replace Tomlinson? Patricia de Stacy Harrison, a high ranking State Department official who’s a former co-chair of the Republican National Committee. Does that sound like someone objective? Unbiased? Fair? Balanced?

Besides, wouldn’t you think that the head of public broadcasting should be- oh I don’t know- someone with a background in television? Radio? Journalism? Education?

I honestly haven’t figured out if this is all part of the right-wing philosophy that wants to privatize any and all social programs so that all the Federal government is involved in is the military, or if it’s more sinister. An attempt to exert one-party control over every aspect of our culture- “total” control (as in “totalitarianism”).

Maybe I’m over-reacting here, but either way, but it seems like things we were always taught were good, right, and helpful: standing up for what’s right, reporting crime, freedom of the press, free speech, and public television are all things that are under attack by the very people who claim moral superiority.

Thank you James

Thank God, a level headed Iowan has stepped up and shown leadership. Last Thursday (6/23), last minute, Congressman James Leach, R-Iowa proposed an amendment to the spending bill that restored public broadcasting's funding. The House voted 284-140 in favor of Leach's amendment, but how long until either the CPB is dismantled or PBS and NPR are revamped to look more like FOX?

Crackers and Applejacks

This is only our first summer as t-ball parents and I’m really enjoying it. Of course, our coach is pretty patient and forgiving about missing whole practices, let alone being late.

There were appointments and speech therapy appointments and of course dance class and recital rehearsal. Although I’ll admit that I think there was at least one time when I just plain forgot.

I always enjoy watching baseball and softball more than a lot of other sports. It’s a step-by-step process. Batters take turns. Infielders and outfielders have places where they’re supposed to be, so you know where to look for who. By contrast, pretty much everybody is out on the field running in the same direction at the same time- at least that’s how it was for the K-3 teams.
What’s wonderful about watching the Pre-K through 2nd grade T-Ball teams is that it’s so low pressure. That might be the same reason so many people root for the Chicago Cubs. Watching a really good team that has a chance to get somewhere in the post-season can really be stressful.
You know the feeling, that same edge of your seat anxiety. Your adrenaline races as if the fate of the whole world depended on the next play.

Let’s face it, it’s more fun to watch a team that isn’t so close to perfect. You might get to laugh, you love to root for the downtrodden underdog, you empathize and you’re proud of them- not because of some massive accomplishment, but because you know they did they’re best and had fun doing it.

Still, you have to be careful as a parent not to try living vicariously through your kid. I’m certainly one who’d love to have my kids make up for how athletically inept I was when I was a kid.

I always got stuck Way out in far, far, far, deep, deep left field where I could do the least damage.

I couldn’t hit the broadside of a barn with a bat. I won’t even talk about my throwing. I think that I finally learned how to catch when I was in my twenties. The only difference between me and Charlie Brown is that they actually let him pitch.

One good thing about Grace having Apraxia is that I know that she’s going to have troubles with coordination so I don’t demand perfection.

I’ve seen parents who have a hard time if their baby isn’t a world class jock. When little so and so sits down in the dirt and plays with the grass instead of paying attention, some parents really chew them out. At least they don’t start chewing other people’s kids out yet at this age group.
In fact, the best thing about T-ball for these littlest kids is that everybody is cheering for all of them, even the opposing team’s crowd. It is pretty hard to hate 4-7 year old girls on the rival team as if they’re the enemy; they’re too damn cute.

Like when the littlest kid on the team gets a hit and runs to third instead of first. It was okay; she’s left-handed. Or when kids don’t realize that they’re even supposed to run when they’re on base and the next batter gets a hit.

Once Grace was on second and the batter got a hit and finally after waiting for her to get going, I shouted out “C’mon Gracie, run, honey, run!” And she galloped up to the pitcher’s mound instead of to third base. Hey, it looked like it was another base.

The other night, “Grand Slam” Taylor Sandy batted our loaded bases home and the opposing catcher had the ball but just stood there dumbfounded.

Eventually her fans called to her to touch home plate, louder and louder they cheered until finally she ran over to the T-Ball Tee and “touched base” on it, instead of on the real home plate. Our runs filed in safe. What ya gonna do? The bottom of the Tee is shaped just like Home only difference is that it’s black and has a big tall pipe sticking up out of it.

And who cares that the kindergarten shortstop just stands there playing with her loose tooth as the second baseman (a second grader) scoops up the ball that was hit right in front of her.

Just wait till Grandma and Grandpa in Arizona see pictures of her playing ball with her hair and make-up all fancy from the Dance rehearsal, patting her fist into her bright pink mitt!
And her three-year old little sister enjoys coming to games too, even if she doesn’t get to play yet. She climbs the bleachers like a jungle gym, explores the dugout and tries on helmets that are three sizes too big and loves to buy “beef turkey” at the concessions stand.

She even leaned the song, “Take me out to the ball game, Take me out to the clouds. Buy me some cwackers and Applejacks, then I can gem my shoes back…cause it’s 1..2…3…4…9 and go out to the GAME!”

It's all happening at the zoo

Did you know that the Henry Doorly Zoo in Omaha now has a huge new “Magrilla” exhibit? And don’t forget to see the “Fazebras” when you’re there.

We went on safari last Memorial Day weekend. We packed up all thee of our girls, two strollers and plenty of snacks in our minivan and took the hour and ha half trek South to visit the Zoo.
Some dear friends from Lincoln wanted to meet us there since we hadn’t seen each other in almost two years. They brought their own three kids, just one stroller, and plenty of snacks.
Leave it to someone who lived on the L.A. freeways for the better part of a decade to get lost somewhere between Council Bluffs and the big ‘O.’ Eventually that one wrong right turn was corrected by a series of left ones and we found ourselves in a long line outside of Rosenblat stadium’s parking lot.

Who knew that the first official Saturday of summer would be such a busy day for the zoo? Just because of the perfect temperatures, sunshine and breezes- you’d think that a hundred bagillion other families could’ve found something better to do.

After several serpentine loops around aisle after aisle I settled on a parking spot in the sun. Next would come the monumental task of unloading and then searching for the other half of our party. I was worried since we were so far from the zoo entrance and were now several minutes late. I had my binoculars ready.

Miraculously they pulled up behind us and began unloading just across the aisle. So together, like a team of intrepid explorers, both families set out, pushing their strollers across the hills and valleys until at last we reached the front entrance and a line longer than the one at most movie theaters on ‘Star Wars’ opening day.

Someone whispered that the line at the other entrance was only 3 miles long, rather than nine. So we quickly gathered our teams and sprinted downhill across the zoo’s own filled to capacity parking lot.

Eventually we got inside, used the restroom and headed straight for dairy land, where our kids could see the exotic animals that they only get to see say once or twice a week on the farms around where they live.

We asked Ellie, our 3 year old what one animal she most wanted to see. She quickly answered, “The Plumink-goes, because they’re PINK! My favowite color!”

We saw Pumink-goes, and we even talked her into seeing the “Bugrillas” (or Magrillas) although she was afraid of them at first.

We have 3 girls. Our friends have 2 boys and a girl, so it was important to visit the scary, creepy animals in the “Kingdoms of the night” exhibit under the Desert Dome.

The moms took the opportunity to feed the baby and keep the 2 year old girl safe and un-frightend. If you think it’s difficult to keep track of 4 little kids in a crowded public place, you should try it in the dark.

After lunch we braved the Antarctic tundra and the ocean depths. This was harder than you’d think because there was standing room only- and I don’t just mean on the penguin’s ice flow. Apparently it was feeding time for the sharks and Nebraskans and Iowans seem to love to watch fish eat.

You know, the Antarctic gets surprisingly hot when it’s filled with half the population of two states. But it was worth it for the kids to get to see “Nemo” and his friends and many of the inhabitants of Spongebob Squarepant’s home town, Bikini Bottom.

We marched on to see Rhinos and elephants and bears and sea lions and monkeys and birds of all kinds. You know, the hills weren’t all that bad inside the zoo, really, but by God that hike back to the cars was something that even a seasoned shurpa from Mount Everest might fear.
All in all it was a great day, although ever since then, Ellen has been asking us why Charter Oak doesn’t have it’s own zoo. We tell her to take it up with her Uncle Cory who’s on City Council.
After seeing everything from Orangutans to Giraffes from all seven continents and four oceans, we asked Ellie what her favorite animal was at the whole zoo. She answered immediately, “the goat.”

A quick review

I understand that this column is now being seen in the Schleswig Leader. Actually, I think it’s been running there for several weeks now. In the event that this has been at all confusing or even just a novelty- I’d like to clear up any misunderstandings this has led to and answer any possible questions that it might have raised.

First of all, I’m not Mike. I assume that you in Schleswig would know that but at least once a reader of the Charter Oak-Ute NEWspaper mistakenly thought that I was the editor. Definitely not. As Schleswigites know, the Lyon family started ‘the Leader’ then expansions and purchases led them to Mapleton and ‘the PRESS.’ Mike Lyon is the publisher.

Mike & Barb Lyon are good people. They’ve always been very kind and generous with me. Back in the summer of 2002 I managed to talk them in to hiring me for the summer and at the end I submitted an essay called “What I did on my summer vacation,” as perhaps the first installment of a weekly column for the Charter Oak & Ute paper.

The closest thing I think Mike has to an Editor, besides himself would have to be Bonnie Schroeder. When I submitted my first column, she said “We should have been doing this all summer.” She’s always been sweet to me too.

I thought for a long time about what to name this feature. I wanted to call it “Sex, Politics and Religion,” because wanted to be able to write about the things that we often avoid talking about. My hope was that I’d make readers think and get people talking about something other than just the weather.
But I was afraid that such a maverick title would scare readers off, so I just went with “Ted’s Column.” Generic, but safe. I figured it would also give me the freedom to not have to take myself too seriously all the time. Part of me hoped to become the small town Iowa version of Dave Berry.

So who the heck am I and how do I get off writing a weekly column in (now) two small town newspapers if I’m not Mike or Bonnie?

I’m Ted. I live in Charter Oak. I teach Art, Newspaper, Yearbook, computer Graphics, and coach Cheerleading down in Dunlap at Boyer Valley. Yeah, I’m a straight, married, middle-aged guy who coaches cheerleading- but that’s a whole ‘nother column.

I’m originally from the red, red state of Arizona. I was the Editor of my high school newspaper and dreamt of being either a syndicated columnist or an editorial cartoonist. I got my BSEd from Concordia University in Seward, Nebraska. I majored in History and in Art. Seward is where I fell in love with the Midwest and with my wife Bethany, a Neddermeyer from Charter Oak, who’s now a guidance counselor at Maple Valley in Mapleton.

So that’s who I am, but where am I coming from?

Sex: That’s not something I think we should talk about in polite company.
Politics: I always thought of my self as a moderate, pro-worker, pro-farming, lower-middle class traditional kind of guy, but dang, our country has really swung about as far to the right as it can lately, hasn’t it? Some people accuse me of leaning to the left, that may be so, but it’s only because I feel like the boat is a bout to capsize and I need a sense of balance, not because I want to shake the boat for shaking sake. I apologize in advance if I ever set you off, I’m a firm believer in agreeing to disagree but continuing to talk to each other. But like I said, my hope is to make you think and get you talking- better yet, write a letter to the Editor (Mike or Bonnie, not me).

Religion: By definition, this is what is the most important thing in anyone’s life, so it’s pretty difficult for me to not write about it. But if I say, "I will not mention him or speak any more in his name," his word is in my heart like a fire, a fire shut up in my bones. I am weary of holding it in; indeed, I cannot. (Jeremiah 20:9).

I went to Concordia because it’s a Christian college. I wrestled with whether or not to become a pastor and Beth and I taught for 7 years at a Christian school in Los Angeles. I’ve been the Youth Counselor at St. John in Charter Oak since we moved back. So, you can expect some faith issues in this column from time to time.
I’m sure that it drives some people batty that anyone can be a Missouri Synod Lutheran and a registered Democrat at the same time. I figure, Jesus was a radical, barefoot, long haired, unemployed, homeless guy who bucked the establishment and loved, accepted, spent time with, forgave, and was even willing to die for everyone and anyone no matter who they were. I’m pretty tame by comparison.

Somehow the good Lord and Mike saw fit to hire me again this summer, so who knows, even though Schleswig is really Bonnie’s beat, maybe I’ll get to meet some of you and try to sell you an ad. Even if I don’t I hope that you’ll keep reading and I hope you enjoy what you read most of the time.

The rest of the time, I hope you’ll send your letters to Bonnie so we can publish them, after all this is YOUR newspaper. The best way to keep it that way is to participate in it by contributing. Have a great summer.

Watergate

With the revelation this month of former FBI Asst. Director Mark Felt as "Deep Throat," why not visit this online museum exhibit on Watergate, The Washington Post, Bob Woodward, and Carl Bernstien. It's got actual news clippings and photos. It's easy to read and understand- definitely worth a look.

Watergate Exhibit at U of Tex