Democracy in the Balance, Sojourners Magazine/August 2004:
"Democracy in the Balance
How do we nurture the healing side of religion over the killing side? How do we protect the soul of democracy against bad theology in service of an imperial state?
by Bill Moyers"
Saturday, July 31, 2004
Friday, July 30, 2004
Lutheran Church - Missouri Synod - National Youth Gathering 2004
Here's a site for those of you who are interested in the youth gathering that Bethany & I took kids to last week. it was great. Thank you for your prayers!
Here's a site for those of you who are interested in the youth gathering that Bethany & I took kids to last week. it was great. Thank you for your prayers!
from a dear friend in response to the Preasthood of all believers Blog
"Amen bro!
You know that I've shared the same disgruntling in my heart at many
times. But it is this same thought that pulls me through. God may send
a whale to swallow me some day and then spit me out at the doors of a
seminary. I trust that if this is God's will for my life, He will send
a whale. In the meantime, I am busying myself with ministry where I'm
at. I'm neither afraid of the whale, nor anxious for its arrival. I'm
just not willing to let Satan waste any of my valuable time fretting a
decision that God will take care of for me if He so wills.
Peace
Peace"
"Amen bro!
You know that I've shared the same disgruntling in my heart at many
times. But it is this same thought that pulls me through. God may send
a whale to swallow me some day and then spit me out at the doors of a
seminary. I trust that if this is God's will for my life, He will send
a whale. In the meantime, I am busying myself with ministry where I'm
at. I'm neither afraid of the whale, nor anxious for its arrival. I'm
just not willing to let Satan waste any of my valuable time fretting a
decision that God will take care of for me if He so wills.
Peace
Peace"
Thursday, July 29, 2004
the Priesthood of all believers
Over the last several years I have wrestled with whether or not to go back to school to become a pastor. One of the things that most holds me back is my obligation to my immediate family first and the Church second (see 2 Corinthians 7:32-35). The other is the ridiculous amount of politics an controversy in the Church (see 1 Tim 6:4 & Titus 3:9). There is an element of malcontents who make it their business to police the Church for heretics when they should be about the work of the Great Commission. Mostly it irritates me, but I'd be lying if I said that it didn't also intimidate me.
But the more I pray about it and the more I read the Bible, the less I think that it is necessary to wear a black collar and have the letters "Rev." before your name.
All of us are called to the "priesthood of all believers" (1 Pet 2:9). So, wherever God takes me, whether I remain a public school teacher or became a trash collector, He can use me and work through me as His instrument. I will not let myself feel inadequate or inferior for not being in "professional" ministry.
After all in His book "Babylonian Captivity of the Church," Martin Luther himself said that pastors are no better than laymen, they are only in a different office.
The first President of the Lutheran Church~Missouri Synod, C. F. W. Walther said: "Mission work is particularly the obligation of Lutheran Christians today because of the wealth God has given them and the open doors He has set before them. . . No one should say 'I am no pastor'. . . You have been baptized and through Holy Baptism . . . every Christian has received not only the power, but the full authority and the right, but also the obligation under penalty of losing divine grace himself or herself, to watch, to care and to help that others may also be enlightened and brought to Christ."
So if God wants me to be an actual pastor so badly, He can make it happen, but I don't need to stress-out about it anymore. I'm sick of fretting and fuming. I know that He has use for me and has touched people in my life already.
In so far as God speaks through me and uses me to share His Word with others, I am a Prophet.
In so far as God uses me as an intermediator when I intercede on behalf of others with Him in prayer, and represent His love and forgiveness to others daily, I am a Priest.
In so far as God uses me as an example and a leader and because Christ makes us heirs to His Kingdom, I am a King.
The name "Christian" means "little imitators of Chirst," or "little anointed ones." You and I are all called, made holy and set aside for God's purposes.
Thank God that He saved me by grace, through faith, in order to do the good works for which He created me (Ephesians 2:8-10.)
But the more I pray about it and the more I read the Bible, the less I think that it is necessary to wear a black collar and have the letters "Rev." before your name.
All of us are called to the "priesthood of all believers" (1 Pet 2:9). So, wherever God takes me, whether I remain a public school teacher or became a trash collector, He can use me and work through me as His instrument. I will not let myself feel inadequate or inferior for not being in "professional" ministry.
After all in His book "Babylonian Captivity of the Church," Martin Luther himself said that pastors are no better than laymen, they are only in a different office.
The first President of the Lutheran Church~Missouri Synod, C. F. W. Walther said: "Mission work is particularly the obligation of Lutheran Christians today because of the wealth God has given them and the open doors He has set before them. . . No one should say 'I am no pastor'. . . You have been baptized and through Holy Baptism . . . every Christian has received not only the power, but the full authority and the right, but also the obligation under penalty of losing divine grace himself or herself, to watch, to care and to help that others may also be enlightened and brought to Christ."
So if God wants me to be an actual pastor so badly, He can make it happen, but I don't need to stress-out about it anymore. I'm sick of fretting and fuming. I know that He has use for me and has touched people in my life already.
In so far as God speaks through me and uses me to share His Word with others, I am a Prophet.
In so far as God uses me as an intermediator when I intercede on behalf of others with Him in prayer, and represent His love and forgiveness to others daily, I am a Priest.
In so far as God uses me as an example and a leader and because Christ makes us heirs to His Kingdom, I am a King.
The name "Christian" means "little imitators of Chirst," or "little anointed ones." You and I are all called, made holy and set aside for God's purposes.
Thank God that He saved me by grace, through faith, in order to do the good works for which He created me (Ephesians 2:8-10.)
The promise after the storm
One afternoon I had some business in Mapleton, here at the NEWSpaper’s offices. I brought Ellie, our two year, old with me since her sister had swimming lessons.
As we were on our way home through Ute, Ellie asked me, “Da-ad, where we going?”
“We’re just headed home to Charter Oak,” I answered.
“Me don’t wanna go home!” she protested, “Me wanna go to Kindergaawten!”
She often combines the songs that her older sister has taught her- “A-B-C-D- E-I-Yo-The BIBLE tells me SO!”
I don’t know what makes me more happy, that she’s so excited about learning and going to school or that she already knows how much God loves her. These are both things that have trickled down from her big sister Gracie’s experiences at Noah’s Ark Pre-School.
God saved Noah and his family from the flood that destroyed the whole world by sheltering them in the Ark that He’d had Noah build. Decades ago God used Sandy Bramley, Lynn Hoffman and St. John Lutheran Church to build Noah’s Ark Preschool.
Many people mourned the loss of St. John Lutheran Elementary School, but God kept His promises by providing Noah’s Ark to provide children with a strong preparation for Kindergarten and Elementary school and more importantly a strong foundation in knowing God’s love for them through His Son Jesus and His Word, the Bible.
Now Noah’s Ark has faced some stormy seas. Long time director Sandy Bramley retired, St. John Lutheran’s long time pastor L.C. Gebhardt retired, and Charter Oak-Ute public school launched a “transitional-kindergarten” preschool of it’s own in Ute.
But I want you to know that the Ark is not being decommissioned and put into dry-dock. St. John Lutheran’s Board of Education recently met with Mrs. Bramley to make sure that it continues the serving kids as they first set out on life’s voyage.
Noah’s Ark is still State Certified. We’ve asked Sandy’s Daughter and long-time assistant Gretchen Bonsall to take over the helm as Director. Pastor Brandt of St. Paul’s Ute is serving St. John as it’s vacancy Pastor until we call a new one.
While COU’s “T-K” will no doubt be an outstanding service for those students who because of learning or behavior difficulties aren’t quite ready for full-fledged kindergarten, the can’t even talk about Jesus or His love, let alone focus on it because of the separation of Church and State. I don’t want to disparage COU’s new program in any way, I’m sure it’s exemplary, but Noah’s Ark is not only a tradition in Charter Oak and Ute, it is a vital ministry that effects the spiritual formation of children in a very real way.
But Noah’s Ark needs passengers to stay afloat. Because people may not have known what was going on, they may not have thought about registering their children for the Fall yet. We need more parents to enroll their children soon.
Noah’s Ark serves 2 and 3 year olds 2 days a week for less than $50 a month, including meals and snacks. I didn’t think Ellie was old enough, but Sandy assured me that if they will turn three by December 30, they can start Preschool.
Noah’s Ark serves 4 and 5 year olds three days a week for just $55 a month, including meals and snacks. These kids get a lot of attention and preparation of skills they’ll need for kindergarten, and they go on some great field trips. Best of all, they hear about God’s love and promises every day that they’re on board the Ark. Surely that’s something that Catholic, Methodist, Baptist, ANY Christian parents and grandparents would want for their preschoolers- not just Lutherans!
So if you have or know someone who has a 2-5 year old and you’re looking for the best head start you can give them in life, please call St. John Lutheran’s office, or Sandy Bramley or Gretchen Bonsall a call and tell them you’d like to reserve space on this Fall’s voyage of promise.
As we were on our way home through Ute, Ellie asked me, “Da-ad, where we going?”
“We’re just headed home to Charter Oak,” I answered.
“Me don’t wanna go home!” she protested, “Me wanna go to Kindergaawten!”
She often combines the songs that her older sister has taught her- “A-B-C-D- E-I-Yo-The BIBLE tells me SO!”
I don’t know what makes me more happy, that she’s so excited about learning and going to school or that she already knows how much God loves her. These are both things that have trickled down from her big sister Gracie’s experiences at Noah’s Ark Pre-School.
God saved Noah and his family from the flood that destroyed the whole world by sheltering them in the Ark that He’d had Noah build. Decades ago God used Sandy Bramley, Lynn Hoffman and St. John Lutheran Church to build Noah’s Ark Preschool.
Many people mourned the loss of St. John Lutheran Elementary School, but God kept His promises by providing Noah’s Ark to provide children with a strong preparation for Kindergarten and Elementary school and more importantly a strong foundation in knowing God’s love for them through His Son Jesus and His Word, the Bible.
Now Noah’s Ark has faced some stormy seas. Long time director Sandy Bramley retired, St. John Lutheran’s long time pastor L.C. Gebhardt retired, and Charter Oak-Ute public school launched a “transitional-kindergarten” preschool of it’s own in Ute.
But I want you to know that the Ark is not being decommissioned and put into dry-dock. St. John Lutheran’s Board of Education recently met with Mrs. Bramley to make sure that it continues the serving kids as they first set out on life’s voyage.
Noah’s Ark is still State Certified. We’ve asked Sandy’s Daughter and long-time assistant Gretchen Bonsall to take over the helm as Director. Pastor Brandt of St. Paul’s Ute is serving St. John as it’s vacancy Pastor until we call a new one.
While COU’s “T-K” will no doubt be an outstanding service for those students who because of learning or behavior difficulties aren’t quite ready for full-fledged kindergarten, the can’t even talk about Jesus or His love, let alone focus on it because of the separation of Church and State. I don’t want to disparage COU’s new program in any way, I’m sure it’s exemplary, but Noah’s Ark is not only a tradition in Charter Oak and Ute, it is a vital ministry that effects the spiritual formation of children in a very real way.
But Noah’s Ark needs passengers to stay afloat. Because people may not have known what was going on, they may not have thought about registering their children for the Fall yet. We need more parents to enroll their children soon.
Noah’s Ark serves 2 and 3 year olds 2 days a week for less than $50 a month, including meals and snacks. I didn’t think Ellie was old enough, but Sandy assured me that if they will turn three by December 30, they can start Preschool.
Noah’s Ark serves 4 and 5 year olds three days a week for just $55 a month, including meals and snacks. These kids get a lot of attention and preparation of skills they’ll need for kindergarten, and they go on some great field trips. Best of all, they hear about God’s love and promises every day that they’re on board the Ark. Surely that’s something that Catholic, Methodist, Baptist, ANY Christian parents and grandparents would want for their preschoolers- not just Lutherans!
So if you have or know someone who has a 2-5 year old and you’re looking for the best head start you can give them in life, please call St. John Lutheran’s office, or Sandy Bramley or Gretchen Bonsall a call and tell them you’d like to reserve space on this Fall’s voyage of promise.
Thursday, July 22, 2004
It’s not FAIR that it’s over
The weather on Sunday and Monday of Achievement Days was typically sweltering, but Tuesday and Wednesday we absolutely beautiful. We’re really fortunate in Charter Oak to have the Achievement Days. I enjoy them a lot more than any County Fair, and I’ll tell you why.
They’re a lot cheaper, they don’t smell near as bad, you know almost everybody there, and you don’t have a heart attack if you lose track of your kids for a few minutes- what’s more, it’s harder to lose your kids in the first place- or for them to lose you for that matter.
If you happened to miss the Achievement Days, July 11-14, you might not have heard Dan Kuhlmann announce at the livestock show that the Charter Oak Boosters is the largest 4-H group in Crawford County. And the Ute Explorers are the biggest in Monona County.
According to the law of averages, therefore, you probably saw projects and livestock that will be winning ribbons in Onawa and Denison soon, and no doubt on to Des Moines for the State Fair too!
Don’t quote me on this, but I believe someone told me that 2004 was the 57th year for the Charter Oak Achievement Days.
Ron Welner told me that 2004 was the 50th anniversary of the building used by the Methodist Church for their annual food stand. How about that? Come to think of it, looking up at the canvas roof, I was kind of reminded of the Korean War era hospital tents on M*A*S*H.
Imagine, every year they fold the thing up and store it in the old garage behind the Church. After this year, of course it will be retired since the Methodists will be able to borrow a portion of the much anticipated new shelter house.
I realize that the shelter house hasn’t been without it’s share of controversy- which you notice I’ve deliberately steered clear of in this column. Ya never like to lose trees, but rumor has it the ones that came down proved to be pretty sick after all. Between our park and the arboretum across the highway, we still put many another town to shame as trees go. And it will sure be nice to enjoy 4H exhibits in air conditioned comfort next year.
All I know is, those Methodists always have some wonderful pie and everyone who volunteers at the food stand is friendly and cheerful- you can’t always say that about the service at some county and state fairs. I for one really appreciate their dedication.
And we’re incredibly lucky to enjoy the Alumni BBQ and the Clubettes’ fishing pond (box), and the popcorn, cotton candy, root beer floats, games, face painting, auction and Bingo games too! I hope that as a community, we know how lucky we are and appreciate all the hard work that so many volunteers put in.
I don’t know of many towns as small as Charter Oak that have as nice a children’s playground as we do. Not to mention our pool, tennis courts and phenomenal Softball team!
Maybe I wasn’t in there long enough or was there when it was relatively cool, but I swear our livestock “barns” smell a helluva lot better than any I’ve been in at county and state fairs.
Of course live stock is gonna be fun with my girls.
“Hi big cows! Hi big cows” my two year old, Ellie waved to all the cattle as we walked through the stalls. She’s so friendly.
But I’m a little worried about her older sister Grace’s tastes and sense of aesthetics. As she crouched down to look at one hog through the fence, she mused “Oooh, he’s so CUTE! He Beuootiful!”
They’re a lot cheaper, they don’t smell near as bad, you know almost everybody there, and you don’t have a heart attack if you lose track of your kids for a few minutes- what’s more, it’s harder to lose your kids in the first place- or for them to lose you for that matter.
If you happened to miss the Achievement Days, July 11-14, you might not have heard Dan Kuhlmann announce at the livestock show that the Charter Oak Boosters is the largest 4-H group in Crawford County. And the Ute Explorers are the biggest in Monona County.
According to the law of averages, therefore, you probably saw projects and livestock that will be winning ribbons in Onawa and Denison soon, and no doubt on to Des Moines for the State Fair too!
Don’t quote me on this, but I believe someone told me that 2004 was the 57th year for the Charter Oak Achievement Days.
Ron Welner told me that 2004 was the 50th anniversary of the building used by the Methodist Church for their annual food stand. How about that? Come to think of it, looking up at the canvas roof, I was kind of reminded of the Korean War era hospital tents on M*A*S*H.
Imagine, every year they fold the thing up and store it in the old garage behind the Church. After this year, of course it will be retired since the Methodists will be able to borrow a portion of the much anticipated new shelter house.
I realize that the shelter house hasn’t been without it’s share of controversy- which you notice I’ve deliberately steered clear of in this column. Ya never like to lose trees, but rumor has it the ones that came down proved to be pretty sick after all. Between our park and the arboretum across the highway, we still put many another town to shame as trees go. And it will sure be nice to enjoy 4H exhibits in air conditioned comfort next year.
All I know is, those Methodists always have some wonderful pie and everyone who volunteers at the food stand is friendly and cheerful- you can’t always say that about the service at some county and state fairs. I for one really appreciate their dedication.
And we’re incredibly lucky to enjoy the Alumni BBQ and the Clubettes’ fishing pond (box), and the popcorn, cotton candy, root beer floats, games, face painting, auction and Bingo games too! I hope that as a community, we know how lucky we are and appreciate all the hard work that so many volunteers put in.
I don’t know of many towns as small as Charter Oak that have as nice a children’s playground as we do. Not to mention our pool, tennis courts and phenomenal Softball team!
Maybe I wasn’t in there long enough or was there when it was relatively cool, but I swear our livestock “barns” smell a helluva lot better than any I’ve been in at county and state fairs.
Of course live stock is gonna be fun with my girls.
“Hi big cows! Hi big cows” my two year old, Ellie waved to all the cattle as we walked through the stalls. She’s so friendly.
But I’m a little worried about her older sister Grace’s tastes and sense of aesthetics. As she crouched down to look at one hog through the fence, she mused “Oooh, he’s so CUTE! He Beuootiful!”
Thursday, July 15, 2004
Please pray for my Cheer squad from Boyer Valley. We are going to an all day clinic this Saturday (July 17th) at a College in Sioux City. It will be the first time our new squad works together. It can be pretty intense and it’s usually brutally hot. So please pray for their safety, that they learn and remember as much as possible, and that this is a “bonding” experience for them too. The girls going are Moe Clemon (2005), Rena Hayden (‘08), Randi Stephens(‘05), and rookies Aleigh Beam (‘05). And Kelli Allen (’05), along with Middle School veteran Bethany Osborne (Class of 2009),
Please also pray for Bethany & I and ten students from St John’s Lutheran Youth Group. We’ll will be attending the National Lutheran Youth Gathering in Orlando Fla, along with over 33,000 other LCMS teenagers from across the country. We’ll be leaving Thurs July 22 and return home to Des Moines on July 28. While you’re at it, please pray for our girls Grace (5) and Ellie (2) who’ll be spending the week at their Grandma & Grampa’s farm. We’ll miss ‘em!
The Gathering is intended by organizers to be a “faith-building experience,” NOT just another vacation. It’s theme, “Beyond Imagination” is based on Ephesians 3:20-21. The goal is for kids to grow in their relationship with God.
Students will participate in mass worship events, Christian concerts, devotions, Bible Studies, servant events, and seminars given by Christian speakers on a variety of subjects pertaining to young people’s lives and faiths.
You can learn more about the gathering by visiting the National Youth Gathering
Web site: nyg.lcms.org
Please Pray for us daily
A few years ago there was a best selling devotional book based on the “Jabez Prayer” from the book of Chronicles. I’d like you to consider another prayer that you can use every day.
Paul’s Prayer for the Church in Ephesus
“I keep asking that the God of our Lord Jesus Christ, the glorious Father, may give you the Spirit of wisdom and revelation, so that you may know Him better. I pray also that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened in order that you may know the hope to which He called you, the riches of His glorious inheritance in the saints and His incomparably great power for us who believe.”
~Ephesians 1:17-1
Pray for our Youth Group members
Dear Lord,
May Your Holy Spirit help the members of St. John’s Lutheran Youth Fellowship grow in their relationship with God. Please open their eyes, minds, and hearts to Your Word. Increase their faith, their knowledge of the You and their wisdom, so that they can become who God wants them to be. Keep them safe during their travels and may their journey be a blessing to them, their families, and our congregation.
In Jesus name we pray, Amen!
Going to National Youth Gathering in Orlando, Fla:
Jake Goslar- Sophomore
Terry Goslar-2004 Graduate
Grant Kuhlmann-Senior
Jason Kuhlmann- Sophomore
Lee Kuhlmann- Senior
Brandon Kruze- Senior
Bryant Maack- Junior
James Magill- Sophomore
Lacy Neddermeyer- Senior
Melissa Theis-Senior
Bethany & Ted Mallory- Counselors
Pray it for yourself. You can pray it daily like the Lord’s Prayer or the Jabez Prayer:
Holy Spirit help me grow in my relationship with God,
increase my faith, my knowledge of the You and my wisdom,
so that I can become who God wants me to be. Amen!
Please also pray for Bethany & I and ten students from St John’s Lutheran Youth Group. We’ll will be attending the National Lutheran Youth Gathering in Orlando Fla, along with over 33,000 other LCMS teenagers from across the country. We’ll be leaving Thurs July 22 and return home to Des Moines on July 28. While you’re at it, please pray for our girls Grace (5) and Ellie (2) who’ll be spending the week at their Grandma & Grampa’s farm. We’ll miss ‘em!
The Gathering is intended by organizers to be a “faith-building experience,” NOT just another vacation. It’s theme, “Beyond Imagination” is based on Ephesians 3:20-21. The goal is for kids to grow in their relationship with God.
Students will participate in mass worship events, Christian concerts, devotions, Bible Studies, servant events, and seminars given by Christian speakers on a variety of subjects pertaining to young people’s lives and faiths.
You can learn more about the gathering by visiting the National Youth Gathering
Web site: nyg.lcms.org
Please Pray for us daily
A few years ago there was a best selling devotional book based on the “Jabez Prayer” from the book of Chronicles. I’d like you to consider another prayer that you can use every day.
Paul’s Prayer for the Church in Ephesus
“I keep asking that the God of our Lord Jesus Christ, the glorious Father, may give you the Spirit of wisdom and revelation, so that you may know Him better. I pray also that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened in order that you may know the hope to which He called you, the riches of His glorious inheritance in the saints and His incomparably great power for us who believe.”
~Ephesians 1:17-1
Pray for our Youth Group members
Dear Lord,
May Your Holy Spirit help the members of St. John’s Lutheran Youth Fellowship grow in their relationship with God. Please open their eyes, minds, and hearts to Your Word. Increase their faith, their knowledge of the You and their wisdom, so that they can become who God wants them to be. Keep them safe during their travels and may their journey be a blessing to them, their families, and our congregation.
In Jesus name we pray, Amen!
Going to National Youth Gathering in Orlando, Fla:
Jake Goslar- Sophomore
Terry Goslar-2004 Graduate
Grant Kuhlmann-Senior
Jason Kuhlmann- Sophomore
Lee Kuhlmann- Senior
Brandon Kruze- Senior
Bryant Maack- Junior
James Magill- Sophomore
Lacy Neddermeyer- Senior
Melissa Theis-Senior
Bethany & Ted Mallory- Counselors
Pray it for yourself. You can pray it daily like the Lord’s Prayer or the Jabez Prayer:
Holy Spirit help me grow in my relationship with God,
increase my faith, my knowledge of the You and my wisdom,
so that I can become who God wants me to be. Amen!
Vocabulary of a two year old
by Ted Mallory
Thursday July 15, 2004
Our two year old, Ellen has three phrases that she uses in place of a period to let us know that she’s spoken a complete sentence. They are: “You know it; I said; and Me told you.” Allow me to demonstrate how she might use them:
“It waining outside, you know it?” (Translation: “it is raining outside.”)
“I wan mo’ milky, I said.” (“Translation: “May I have more milk, please?”) If the request is not met immediately, you can expect to hear “I SAID” a few more times and perhaps louder. “Mo’ milk, I SAID!”
Sometimes all three may be strung together to form an exclamation-“See? Me TOLD you it Waining! Me told you, I said.” (Translation: “I notice that it is still raining outside.”)
These are all phrases that she learned from her older sister Grace. I believe Grace used them whenever she was frustrated with having to repeat herself to adults who didn’t understand her. Grace is still struggling with dysarthria and/or dis-co-ordination, disorders that don’t have anything to do with her understanding and learning, but hamper her being understood by others.
When Grace was two she might have said, “Itwaninouside”
Of course, we’d respond, “What did you say honey?”
And she’d repeat her statement, punctuated with her frustration, “It WAINING OUSIDE, you KNOW IT!”
We like to say that Ellen two going on 14, if only because she’s decided to call us “Bef and Ted” as often as she does “Mom and Dad.”
As rough as it was understanding Grace, it’s been even more of a challenge to understand Ellie because Ellie will use completely different words for certain meanings. For example, we believe that in her language, “Helwen” means “Sister.” Why else would she use the word “Helwen” whenever she calls to her sister Grace?
“Helwen! Come here Helwen!”
“My names not Helwen, I’m Gwace, you Helwen,” Grace may answer.
“Come on Gwace” Ellen will reply.
Likewise, for a long time “Grammy” was any woman over 50. Now that she has “Gwammy Mawge” separated from “Gwama Laura” and “Anntie Gwadys,” she has decided that ANY family member is a cousin.
As in “Gwama Lawra, you my COUSIN!”
Of course, her favorite cousin is Braden. Braden is in seventh grade and lives in Topeka Kansas. I believe Ellen is in love with Braden. Once she told us that she and Braden were going to have a baby. Don’t worry, our family strongly discourages inbreeding.
When Grace looks over the photos on our refrigerator, she likes to name off all of her cousins, “Nolan my cousin, Hallie my cousin, Cale my cousin, Braden my…”
“NO!” Ellie declares, “Bwaden’s MY cousin!” She’s just a little possessive.
One day I told Ellie, “I LOVE you SO much! And I love Gracie, and I love your Mommy…”
To which she instantly responded “an I wuv BWADEN!”
A “pickle” could be a pickle, an onion, or a mushroom. All meats are “chicken,” even ham and beef, except for “cheese boogers.”
One day, I was trying to customize the song “Old MacDonald,” by singing “Pappa Allan has a farm,” with the girls. Ellen started singing her own song altogether.
“Old McDonald’s Happy Meal, EE I E I O!”
That, of course is the full name of that fast food restaurant, by the way. It’s not just “McDonald’s.” The name is actually “McDonald’s-Happy-Meal.” You know that you’re nearly there when you drive past “All-Mort” (Wal-Mart).
Ants, butterflies, mosquitoes and bees are all “bUgs,” but spiders are “Sooper Spidah Man.” Peter Parker, of course is a “big boy like Bwaden.”
Her favorite color is orange, and she knows what orange looks like, but if you ask her to identify any other color and they’re all either “bwack or pupurle.”
Last Christmas, my Brother-in-law Cory put a frightening thought in our heads- Hallie, Grace, and Ellie driving around in a car in ten or twelve years from now. But I have found hope that Ellie will be a cautious driver someday. I have this hope because recently she’s become a serious back seat driver.
From her car seat behind be in the van comes a constant stream of “watch out Daddy, slow down Daddy, too slow Daddy, turn the fan on Daddy, look out Dad, Stop Dad, Go Dad…” and occasionally “where we going, Ted?”
It’s usually a joy to listen to a two-year-olds prattle. But there are times you wish they would be seen and not heard. Like when we were shopping and she told me in a loud voice in front of the whole store, “Dad, you gotta BIG BUTT!”
Thursday, July 08, 2004
Grow up to be little
Both of our girls tell us they’re teachers- not that they’re GOING to become teachers when they grow up, but that they ARE teachers. I’m pretty sure that with Grace, the 5 yr old it is an identity thing. We both go to school to work, on occasion we both have conferences or seminars to go to. Essentially it’s part of who we are, thus Grace thinks of her self the same way, just like she’s a Mallory, a Neddermeyer, a Christian or an American, she’s also a Teacher.
I still have hope. There’s at least a good 18 years between now and a Bachelor’s degree for her so maybe respect for teachers or at least teacher salaries will go up, or she’ll marry some rich doctor or engineer, or maybe she’ll change her mind.
With Ellen, the two year old, on the other hand, being a teacher definitely part of play time. The other day she sat all three of us down in chairs on our porch and held class.
“Now, you sit here, and you sit hewa (here), and you sit down, NOW, me gonna teach you!” she announced, and a serious lecture followed, “No puddles, no MUD,” she explained as she paced back and forth in front of us, “No stweet (she’s not old enough to cross alone yet), no touchies (as in glass and china in Hallmark or Amee-and-Me), no SINGING (whered that one come from?), and no puddles, and no STWEET! O-tay?” she concluded.
Wow, kid, you hear us say “No” to a lot of things or what?
I know that teaching is important to her because I’ve had to get some private tutoring. When we’re in the back yard she’ll suddenly decide that I need to climb into the “class-woom” at the top of the slide so that “ME gonna tweech you!”
There’s barely enough room for anyone up there, let alone an adult, but I fold up my legs, and my pride and listen to the day’s lesson.
“Ummm, No mud, and no street, and no bubbles, O-tay Daddy? And, and, no stweet, and NO puddles!”
Yes ma’am, no ma’am.
But we’re keeping perspective, we remind ourselves that she’s the child and still has a lot to learn.
Take for example, conflict resolution. My hope is that this lesson will prevent countless problems on the playground when they’re both at real school…
Grace wanted to play basketball, Ellen wanted to play baseball, they both brought their argument to me, but I was on the phone at the time.
“Hold on just a second girls, Daddy’s on the phone, I’ll help you in just a second.” I said
At this point Grace playfully bounces the basketball on Ellie’s forehead. It wasn’t enough to hurt her and it was actually hard to keep from grinning, but then Ellie wholloped Grace with her plastic baseball bat.
“Okay, okay, I’m going to have to let you go, I seem to have a situation here,” I told the caller, and I really had to hold back the laughter. Part of me wished I’d had it on tape so I could’ve sent it in to America’s Funniest Videos, another part of me was tempted to spank Ellie because she really hit the hardest and with the most malice, but I bit my cheek and put them both into “time-out.”
Two year olds really don’t have a firm grip on reality yet.
I just about blew a gasket the time I walked in on her in the bathroom. A puddle of #1, plenty of #2 smeared across the floor (that I’d scrubbed just a couple hours before), and her pull-up stuffed in the toilet. She was either trying to flush it or scrub it out- I was to fuming to be able to tell for sure. Of course, after I’d given her a bath and cleaned up her mess it dawned on me that this was a good thing, it means that she’s STARTING to catch on to the whole potty-training thing we’d been working on, she just wasn’t entirely clear on the concept just yet.
Then there was the time my parents called from Phoenix. It used to be that she’s listen for a minute or two, press some buttons and drop the phone. Now she gleefully chatters away for nearly a half an hour. Recently she decided to give them a tour of the house (remember, this is by phone).
She held the phone out at arms length and told them “These my books,” walked over to the television, made sure the phone was looking at the screen and told them “Arthur’s on,” then pointed the phone at a clothe basket, “these my clowths.”
I suppose that these days some of you may have those new phones with miniaturized digital cameras in them, but I can assure you, Ellie's Grandma was thoroughly confused.
Like I said, two year olds really don’t have a firm grip on reality yet. But then again, sometimes, they say things that are remarkably profound.
“Da-aad,” Ellie sang my name to get my attention so I knew she was about share something important with me, “Umm, Dad, ummm..”
“What is it honey?” I coaxed.
“Um, maybe someday,” she paused, what? Maybe someday we can go to the park? “umm, maybe someday when you gwow up YOU can be wittle too!”
Sometimes two-year old logic perplexes me so I tested her for clarification. They call this “active listening” in teacher biz, I call it repeating what people just said to you, Ellie does it a lot so turnabout is fair play.
“Let me get this straight,” I said, “when I grow up, maybe I can be little too? Like you?”
“Yeah, when you gwow up you can be wittle too!” she promised. I’m looking forward to it.
I still have hope. There’s at least a good 18 years between now and a Bachelor’s degree for her so maybe respect for teachers or at least teacher salaries will go up, or she’ll marry some rich doctor or engineer, or maybe she’ll change her mind.
With Ellen, the two year old, on the other hand, being a teacher definitely part of play time. The other day she sat all three of us down in chairs on our porch and held class.
“Now, you sit here, and you sit hewa (here), and you sit down, NOW, me gonna teach you!” she announced, and a serious lecture followed, “No puddles, no MUD,” she explained as she paced back and forth in front of us, “No stweet (she’s not old enough to cross alone yet), no touchies (as in glass and china in Hallmark or Amee-and-Me), no SINGING (whered that one come from?), and no puddles, and no STWEET! O-tay?” she concluded.
Wow, kid, you hear us say “No” to a lot of things or what?
I know that teaching is important to her because I’ve had to get some private tutoring. When we’re in the back yard she’ll suddenly decide that I need to climb into the “class-woom” at the top of the slide so that “ME gonna tweech you!”
There’s barely enough room for anyone up there, let alone an adult, but I fold up my legs, and my pride and listen to the day’s lesson.
“Ummm, No mud, and no street, and no bubbles, O-tay Daddy? And, and, no stweet, and NO puddles!”
Yes ma’am, no ma’am.
But we’re keeping perspective, we remind ourselves that she’s the child and still has a lot to learn.
Take for example, conflict resolution. My hope is that this lesson will prevent countless problems on the playground when they’re both at real school…
Grace wanted to play basketball, Ellen wanted to play baseball, they both brought their argument to me, but I was on the phone at the time.
“Hold on just a second girls, Daddy’s on the phone, I’ll help you in just a second.” I said
At this point Grace playfully bounces the basketball on Ellie’s forehead. It wasn’t enough to hurt her and it was actually hard to keep from grinning, but then Ellie wholloped Grace with her plastic baseball bat.
“Okay, okay, I’m going to have to let you go, I seem to have a situation here,” I told the caller, and I really had to hold back the laughter. Part of me wished I’d had it on tape so I could’ve sent it in to America’s Funniest Videos, another part of me was tempted to spank Ellie because she really hit the hardest and with the most malice, but I bit my cheek and put them both into “time-out.”
Two year olds really don’t have a firm grip on reality yet.
I just about blew a gasket the time I walked in on her in the bathroom. A puddle of #1, plenty of #2 smeared across the floor (that I’d scrubbed just a couple hours before), and her pull-up stuffed in the toilet. She was either trying to flush it or scrub it out- I was to fuming to be able to tell for sure. Of course, after I’d given her a bath and cleaned up her mess it dawned on me that this was a good thing, it means that she’s STARTING to catch on to the whole potty-training thing we’d been working on, she just wasn’t entirely clear on the concept just yet.
Then there was the time my parents called from Phoenix. It used to be that she’s listen for a minute or two, press some buttons and drop the phone. Now she gleefully chatters away for nearly a half an hour. Recently she decided to give them a tour of the house (remember, this is by phone).
She held the phone out at arms length and told them “These my books,” walked over to the television, made sure the phone was looking at the screen and told them “Arthur’s on,” then pointed the phone at a clothe basket, “these my clowths.”
I suppose that these days some of you may have those new phones with miniaturized digital cameras in them, but I can assure you, Ellie's Grandma was thoroughly confused.
Like I said, two year olds really don’t have a firm grip on reality yet. But then again, sometimes, they say things that are remarkably profound.
“Da-aad,” Ellie sang my name to get my attention so I knew she was about share something important with me, “Umm, Dad, ummm..”
“What is it honey?” I coaxed.
“Um, maybe someday,” she paused, what? Maybe someday we can go to the park? “umm, maybe someday when you gwow up YOU can be wittle too!”
Sometimes two-year old logic perplexes me so I tested her for clarification. They call this “active listening” in teacher biz, I call it repeating what people just said to you, Ellie does it a lot so turnabout is fair play.
“Let me get this straight,” I said, “when I grow up, maybe I can be little too? Like you?”
“Yeah, when you gwow up you can be wittle too!” she promised. I’m looking forward to it.
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