Adventures in potty training

The girls and I are looking forward to taking a trip next week. It’s the 50th anniversary of Los Angeles Lutheran Jr/Sr High School, so we thought we’d attend the celebrations. It’s been three years since we’ve seen many of our friends, former students and colleagues. We’re also going to spend some time in Arizona, my folks had their 40th anniversary at Easter but we weren’t able to make it back.

We decided to drive rather than fly, so I’m excited to test out the new minivan and I’m excited to get to see all he awesome landscapes this great land has to offer. Grace is excited to see the beach and her new cousin, "baby Daniel," and if she’s lucky, a Diamondbacks game.

"Me like beesbwall," she says whenever we catch a game on TV.

There is something I’m not looking forward to. Bethany’s grandma doesn’t like the fact that we’re traveling, let alone to L.A. while the nation’s on an orange terrorism alert, but that doesn’t phase me. We’re driving, not flying so we’ll avoid all the hassle of upgraded security. I admit, if I let myself, my earthquake-phobia could creep into the back of my mind, but that’s not what I’m dreading most about this trip.

My biggest fear is potty time.

Let me ask you something. How old do you think a child should be for it to be appropriate for a father to stop taking his daughter to the men’s room? I’m thinkin four. I’ll tell you why.

First of all, men’s public restrooms are generally disgusting. Some gas stations or truck stops are cleaner than others. Rest Areas vary on their maintenance quality greatly from state to state. I have found that Nebraska and Iowa do a much better job for example than say, Kansas and Colorado.

Without dwelling too long on a distasteful subject, I should explain to you ladies that each of the four walls in a men’s stall has a unique purpose generally not seen in women’s restrooms. I know only because I’ve drawn a paycheck as a janitor when I was younger.

One wall inevitably is reserved for phone numbers, this of course is a stereotype you’ve seen in sitcoms and movies, but it’s one that’s true. Another, depending on local demographics, is reserved for chewing gum. These walls are quite interesting from an artist’s point of view, actually, since different brands have different colors and textures. From the parent of a four year old, on the other hand, it’s a hassle to keep their hands of the used confections and to explain that one only wants to chew fresh, new gum that one unwraps one’s self.

The next wall is a gross one, so skip this paragraph if you have a weak stomach. It’s the booger wall. Yes, ladies, we know it’s impolite to pass gas and pick our noses in public, so it has to be done somewhere, where else would you suggest? With fewer and fewer men carrying handkerchiefs, if you don’t eat it, it has to go somewhere. Though I for one don’t know what’s wrong with toilet paper, but in men’s defense, most public restrooms are always out.

The last wall, (two if there’s no bubble gum wall) is dedicated to a number of things. Partly as sort of a message board. On the internet, they’d call this a "bulletin board," or a "news group." In a men’s room these can be sexual solicitations or social-political discussions, often featuring racial epithets and allegations of unconventional sexual preference. Perhaps most interesting to anthropologists hundreds of years from now will be the displays of erotic artwork.

Needless to say, the more Grace can recognize letters and words and the more questions she keeps asking, the less I want to be responsible for her and the more comfortable with putting Bethany in charge.

Not long ago, Ellie, our youngest showed an interest in getting potty trained. When a 16 month old does that, you’ve got to take advantage of your narrow window of opportunity. We figure on taking along an "adapter," you know, one of those mini-seats that you put on top of the main seat for tiny fannies.

Here’s how the break-thru went. I’ve since apologized to Bethany for my insensitive reaction.

Ellie followed her sister into the bathroom, pulled down her britches, unfastened her diaper, sat on the trainer-potty and tinkled all by her self. Bethany was elated. Like any proud mom, she immediately called her mom to celebrate the achievement with "Grammy."
This is when I came home from school to find Ellie in the living room, still no pants, leaving a trail of poops behind her

Memorial Day

"Memorial Day...celebrates and solemnly reaffirms from year to year a national act of enthusiasm and faith. It embodies in the most impressive form our belief that to act with enthusiasm and faith is the condition of acting greatly"

~Oliver Wendell Holmes
From an address delivered for Memorial Day, May 30, 1884

Monday is Memorial Day, also known as Decoration Day, Ashes Day, not to be confused with Labor Day, it’s book end on the other side of summer or Veteran’s Day, it’s half-brother which was really intended for the living. Since World War I, it’s also been called Poppy Day, because volunteers sell small, red artificial flowers as a fund-raiser for disabled veterans.

Legend has it that throughout history, after major wars red poppies seem to pop up on battlefields and on soldiers graves. Poppy seeds lay dormant in the soil until it is violently turned or dug up, causing them to sprout.

After WWI in Flanders Field, Belgium. In the bomb craters and on mounds of rubble, poppies bloomed everywhere. The heavily churned earth and high concentration of lime from the limestone buildings made the perfect catalyst for the poppies to grow.

Some thought that the red poppies looked spilled blood. British mothers wore poppies in remembrance of their lost sons. The poppy has since become a symbol of peace and of remembering the sacrifice of the fallen soldier.

Memorial Day may have began in 1868, when Civil War General John A. Logan, commander-in-chief of the Grand Army of the Republic, a Union veterans’ organization, said that May 30th should be special day to decorate the graves of Union soldiers.

He may have chose May 30th on the suggestion of a Franco-American veteran, who noted that May 30th was "The Day of Ashes" in France-the day that Napoleon's remains were returned to France in 1840 from his exile to the island of St. Helena 1200 miles off Africa. What Napoleon’s ashes have to do with Union veterans, I have no idea.

Northern states celebrate Memorial Day on the last Monday in May. This became a federal holiday in 1971. In the deep South, Memorial Day celebrations honor Confederate soldiers who died in "the war between the states." Mississippi and Alabama celebrate Confederate Memorial Day on the last Monday in April. In Florida and Georgia, the date is April 26. May 10 is Memorial Day in North and South Carolina, and the holiday is June 3 in Kentucky, Louisiana, and Tennessee. Texas observes Confederate Heroes Day on January 19 (Robert E. Lee's birthday).

The first large observance was held in 1868 at Arlington National Cemetery, across the Potomac River from Washington, D.C. The cemetery already held the remains of 20,000 Union dead and several hundred Confederate dead. After speeches, children from the Soldiers' and Sailors' Orphan Home and members of the GAR made their way through the cemetery, strewing flowers on both Union and Confederate graves, reciting prayers and singing hymns.

Many Americans don’t know is that how Arlington came to be our national cemetery. Arlington was the home of Gen. Robert E. Lee. Perhaps to send his family a message, Union sympathizers piled the remains of Confederate dead at his doorstep. You can imagine the stench.

Unfortunately the significance of this holiday is sometimes forgotten, buried in ads, sales, barbecues and water sports. It’s easy to see Memorial Day as just another day off. It certainly has a sweetness as the gateway to summer and a time for friends and families to gather.

But especially with two wars just in the last two years, I think we need to remember it for what it was intended, a day of mourning, and prayer for and gratitude to the men and women who lost their lives in the line of duty and their families.

Buy a poppy to support Veterans’ charities, pray for the widowed and orphaned families of the conflicts in Afghanistan and Iraq, and thank God for your freedoms.

"Soldier, rest! Thy warfare o'er,
Sleep the sleep that knows not breaking,
Dream of battled fields no more.
Days of danger, nights of waking."

~Sir Walter Scott
1

Teenagers, Read This!

I figure you didn’t nominate me to speak at your graduation for a lot of very good reasons. For one thing, you don’t know me from Adam. For another I’m not famous. At my high school graduation we had the local weather guy come in a news helicopter.

I have no idea what he said. It was God-awful hot on the football field in June in that polyester graduation gown and he was kind of a goof.

Another reason you didn’t ask for me is that I haven’t done anything amazing and I don’t have a ton of Master’s or Doctorate degrees. At my college graduation we had some missionary who was the director of all kinds of international education or ministry programs or something.

Thinking of him reminds me of another reason you probably didn’t ask for me, I tend to go on and on forever. A good commencement address, or any speech really shouldn’t go on for more than say seven to ten minutes. When I plan for three, I end up talking for anywhere from 15 to 20.

I do remember at least ONE thing my college graduation speaker said. He said something along the lines of "when a butterfly flaps it’s wings in China, it creates a hurricane in Australia."

His point is a good one for you too. What he meant was that EVERYONE makes an impact. Even what seems like the most insignificant action can have enormous impact. Like a smile, a helping hand, letting someone else cut in front of you in line, telling someone that you appreciate what they did or encouraging them. Someone once called these "random acts of kindness."

I’m also well aware of the fact that you didn’t hire me to speak because I’m not an alumnus. A couple of years ago COU had Dr. John Hoffman speak at your graduation. He graduated from COU a year after I graduated from Shadow Mountain.

Today John’s the Dean of Students at Concordia University in Irvine, CA. Personally, I remember thinking that he gave one of the best commencement address I’d ever heard, but frankly, I don’t remember much of what he told kids either.

Since the school board didn’t see fit to invite me to speak to you, here now are some important things you should think about. You might even want to cut this out and tape it to something in your dorm room, or room, or locker at work, or foot locker in the barracks, or in your car or whatever:

Enjoy the ride. No two years of your life will be more intense or exhilarating than the next two. I could speculate about why, but who cares, the point is everybody has been telling you to appreciate high school as the "best years of your life," but really, the next six months will be like the last 4 years squeezed together.

People are more important than things. Measure your success in people, not things. Who have you helped, who has helped you, who have you learned from, who has learned from you? Who do you love? If you measure your success in money or possessions, you’ll either hurt yourself or hurt others.

Don’t burn the bridges you cross. Many of you can’t wait to "get the heck out of this one-horse town." Someday you may appreciate what it gave you, stability, strength, values, sense of belonging. As a matter of fact, someday you may even need those things and miss them. Don’t think that you can’t come home again. You can, if not to Charter Oak and Ute, then at least to some other small town.

With creativity, ingenuity, commitment, and most of all perspective, you can be successful and live comfortably anywhere. Don’t be afraid to go to Washington, Chicago, New York, China, Japan. Feel free to try Omaha, Des Moines, Denver, or Minneapolis. But don’t be afraid to come home either.

Farmer, blue-collar worker, professional, or entrepreneur, you can survive, and even thrive right here if that is what you choose. If that’s not what you choose, that’s fine, but don’t ever regret or deny where you come from, it is a huge part of who you are.

Be proud of that. We are proud of you.

Finally, think about what Chicago Tribune columnist Mary Schmich wrote to graduates back in 1997:

"Inside every adult lurks a graduation speaker dying to get out, some world-weary pundit eager to pontificate on life to young people who'd rather be Rollerblading. Most of us, alas, will never be invited to sow our words of wisdom among an audience of caps and gowns, but there's no reason we can't entertain ourselves by composing a Guide to Life for Graduates.

I encourage anyone over 26 to try this and thank you for indulging my attempt."

Face it, we all become our parents and once you hit your twenties, you’re going to secretly wish that COU would ask you to give a graduation address too. Adults are always trying to give advice to kids, and you will too. Mary Schmich gave some incredibly profound advice in her column. If you don’t remember anything else from this column, PLEASE remember this:

Class of 2003, "Wear sunscreen." Congratulations and good luck.

Important enough to try

A few weeks ago a very dear reader gave me a hug and shared with me how much she enjoyed my column. Then she told me how much she approved of many of the views I share in it, because they sound almost Republican.

Well, first I’d like to think I know my readers and how far I can push you. Second, I’ve always thought of myself as a moderate anyway, fiscally conservative, opposed to reckless spending and fat Federal deficits, but progressive on issues of social justice and equality. Be that as it may, I hope you’ll forgive me if I lean just a little to the left this issue.

Health insurance is a great concern that has been troubling me for some time. Boyer Valley we have to pay 100% of our own family health insurance. They give us an offset that singles don’t receive, but I still end up paying close to $4,000 a year for it, that’s $495 out of each monthly pay check. That’s around 7% of our pay. Like everybody else, Uncle Sam is already taking almost 30%.

What is most discouraging- even frightening for me personally- is that our family insurance rate is going up 33%, so that $495 a month will be edging up toward $660 a month.

I’d like to see the state take on public school teacher’s health insurance. State and County employees get a much better deal. There’s power in numbers. Any employer with less than 200 employees is going to have a hard time finding more affordable rates. It’s no wonder small school districts are constantly shopping for new insurers. Sometimes they’re like credit card companies; the first year they offer a good deal, but the next year they raise their rates 18% and then 33% the next year, and so on.

Surely the State of Iowa could handle helping its teachers with a tiny sin tax, like one more cent on gambling or alcohol or cigarettes. Most states put the majority of their proceeds from lottery ticket sales into education.

Mind you, I’m overjoyed to have what I have. While Lutheran High School paid for all but our $5 co-pays out in L.A. working with a massive HMO was a nightmare. Every time we went to the doctor we waited for hours to get in, we felt like numbers instead of people, and we rarely got to see the same doctor twice.

I also know that a lot of people, like farmers, are self-insured and pay a lot more than we teachers have to. As a matter of fact more than 40 million Americans are uninsured. Better than half of them have full time jobs. A quarter of those uninsured are under 65.

So, as a registered Democrat in Iowa, I’ve been interested in some of what House Minority Leader, Missouri Congressman Richard Gebhardt has been proposing.

Dick Gebhardt claims he can provide healthcare to all of us. He thinks that a place to start is that everyone should be covered through their jobs. If we elect him President in 2004, he plans on a tax credit for employers to expand health insurance, making coverage more affordable.

He says we can take advantage of the existing system of health insurance financing. By reforming the way things already work, instead of re-inventing the wheel, Gebhardt doesn’t see it as making things harder for either employers or employees.

In theory, this could even stimulate the economy, by creating jobs in health care and, presumably increasing worker productivity (because we’ll all be healthier.)

The Gebhardt plan would also expand access to Medicare for uninsured 55 and 64year olds and extend State Child Health Insurance Program coverage to parents of kids already covered.

Gebhardt’s plan seems a lot more grounded in reality than what we’ve heard from Teddy Kennedy or Hillary Clinton. Is it possible to provide quality health care to every American? Well, ask yourself if it’s possible to eradicate SARS, AIDS, or cancer, or to stop terrorism. Maybe, maybe not, but isn’t it important enough to try?
1

Traffic jam, Detour ahead, Expect delays

Jackie Pester likes it when I write about my commute on the beautiful Dunlap Highway (L-51). Here’s a sad one. As you may already know, I try to maintain a strict policy of transparency and candor. After all, you never know when the White House will call and you always want to be able to lay your record out on the table so that there aren’t any skeletons in your closet that the Senate confirmation hearings will drag out. Besides, you’re bound to read about it in the Denison papers eventually anyway, if you haven’t already.

A couple weeks ago, it was such a gorgeous day, and there weren’t a lot of farmers out disking yet, I just sort of forgot myself. I was driving along, enjoying nature’s Spring fashions- the buffing trees, the greening hay, the many calves and I thought to myself…

"This is SO much nicer than L.A.- no traffic whatsoever, I rarely even see another vehicle and have never seen a police car along this route in three years.

"Oh, wait, there’s actually ONE car in the oncoming lane. Say, I wonder what make and model that is anyway, most everybody around here drives GM, no, no this looks more like a Ford product…

"As a matter of fact, I bet that’s a Crown Vic-

"Aren’t those the ones used by the highway pa-

The trooper was very nice and very patient with me. After this past week with Minnesotan prisoners escaping to the Loess Hills, I’m glad that the Iowa State Patrol is in our area after all.

Speaking of highway trouble, you have no idea how much trouble I go through on the Information Superhighway trying to get this column to you every week.

Take last week’s column for instance. Usually I write this on Friday during my free period and try to email it in to Ann or Bonnie after school before I go home. Goes without saying that we didn’t have school on Good Friday. Since we had an early dismissal on Thursday, I thought I’d just write it up and send it after school Thursday and still get home early. But the best laid plans run awry.

Since they’re building a new school right next to the old one in Dunlap, they decided to cut the power almost immediately after all the students cleared out. Dang, fall back on plan ‘B.’

I got up just as early as I normally would have on Friday so that I could write it on the old home computer. But alas, since with two small children, we never have time to use the internet at home and we both have access at work, we canceled our service, thinking we’d save the $14.95 a month. Okay, need a plan ‘C’- got it! The farm! Mom-in-law’s at work, Dad-in-law’s out doing whatever farmers do before they can plant. They won’t mind if I email it from their place.

"Oof! Won’t connect. Ah ha, connected! Oof- cut out on me. Yeah, back on!"

"What’s this? Can’t access Hotmail account? What about ‘disabled Cookies?’ No problem, I’m a technologically literate guy, I think I know how to ‘enable cookies,’ here we go…

"What? Come on you hunk of sillicon!!" Grrr, half an hour later I’d gotten no where and was supposed to have met Bethany & the girls at Wal-Mart to get Grace’s birthday picture taken. I gave up and drove in to the big ‘D.’

We had to hustle back to Charter Oak to make the girl’s hair cut appointments. I gingerly ask Cindy if I can up load the column from their home computer.

"Sure, why not?" she offers.

"Thanks a million!" I scramble up their stairs to get it done and get on with life. No such luck. Beautiful new computer, Windows XP or NT or XL or something other than Windows ’98. The thing tells me that it can’t read my floppy disk because it’s "unformatted."

Now I am technologically literate enough to know that if I had reformatted my disk it would erase everything on it, including the column. Sigh.

"Why don’t we just drive up to Mapleton and give them your disk?" asked Bethany. Because Mike has all Apples at the Paper and I write the column on a PC. Macs can’t read PC disks anymore than new PCs seem to be able to read old PCs. Somehow Cyberspace interprets things, if I email it to them, they can read it. Make sense?

Now we’re on to Plan ‘D,’ I think. It’s hard to keep track. Anyway, we needed to go back to Denison for groceries, so we thought we’d use the good old public library computers. Thank God for American Democracy and God Bless Dale Carnagie, or was it Andrew Carnagie?

Library computer # 1- On the internet, into Hotmail! Hot dog, the furthest I’ve gotten so far. Compose mail, attachments…

"Program has executed illegal operation, fatal error, program will be shut down"

"AAAAURGH!!!"

Library Computer # 3- On the internet, into Hotmail, attachments…. "Internal Error"

"Doh (like Homer Sipmson would say), okay, okay, think, it’s probably some kind of a safety/security block, there’s probably a way around it…." So I decide to open the document and cut and paste it into the email instead of attaching it. No dice, no way to get into the floppy drive- wait! Aha! I open Microsoft Word (the program) and get into the document from there. Cut, paste, send! Alleluia, at last!

So then Tuesday morning I received an email from Bonnie about all the errors in the dumb thing.

And now today, as I write this (a week before you read it) guess what? The PC in my classroom can not connect to the school’s network, let alone the internet. But, hey, it’s done, at 9:10 am on Thursday the 24th, before kids show up for class, it’s done. If only I had a way to get it there.
1

Easter Sonrise

I can’t believe how many people half-believe. Whether you eaves drop, overhear or engage people in a conversation about religion it’s amazing how pessimistic some folks are. I can’t believe how many people have resigned themselves to the fact that they’re headed for Hell.

They resent religious people for being too hypocritical and sometimes they resent God for not wanting them, but they just figure they’ve been too bad to get into Heaven, so "what the Hell?!"

If you’re one of these people, can I let you in on something? It’s not how good or bad you are, it’s not what you know- it’s all who you know. God does want you, He loves ALL of His children, but He won’t ever force you to love Him back.

The Lord is not slow in keeping his promise, as some understand slowness. He is patient with you, not wanting anyone to perish, but everyone to come to repentance. ~2 Peter 3:9

That’s why He sent Jesus, to die and go to Hell, so we won’t have to. And since Jesus defeated death and the Devil on Easter, we don’t have to worry about how many mistakes we’ve made or how bad we’ve been, all we have to do is accept the free gift of His love, forgiveness and salvation.

Surely you’ve heard John 3:16-

16"For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.

Well, let me play Paul Harvey and give you "the rest of the story."

First of all, did you catch that there is no catch? All it says there is "whoever believes." I knew a girl in High School that knew without a doubt that she was going to Hell because she’d had an abortion. So, she said, "I may as well be bad, because I’m already going to Hell."

Listen, thank God you don’t have to be good to get to Heaven because no one could ever possibly be good enough their entire lives to earn their way to Heaven.

Jesus said in Matthew 5, "You have heard that it was said to the people long ago, 'Do not murder, and anyone who murders will be subject to judgment.' 22But I tell you that anyone who is angry with his brother, will be subject to judgment…"You have heard that it was said, 'Do not commit adultery.'28But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart."

It’s our sinful-human nature to be selfish and short sighted. We’re base animals who’re only interested in gratifying our own desires. Romans 3:23 says that "ALL have sinned and fall short of the glory of God." All the goody-goody hypocrites included.

But remember all John 3:16 says that we have to do to be saved is to believe.

8For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith--and this not from yourselves, it is the gift of God-- 9not by works, so that no one can boast. ~Ephesians 2:8-9

Nobody is a better Christian than anybody else. Now, once you believe that Jesus is who He says He is, God the Son, you probably want to learn more about Him and even try to be more like Him. Just like being a recovering alcoholic or a recovering drug addict, you’ll still have the same cravings, but unlike an animal, you’ll recognize that there are consequences for your choices and that "being bad" hurts other people and damages your relationships.

I want to make it perfectly clear to you this Easter that God does not want ANYONE to go to Hell. That’s why He came in the form of Jesus and sacrificed Himself in our place. Hell wasn’t even created for humans. Matthew 25:41makes it very clear that Hell was intended only for Satan and his demons, not for you.

You know John 3:16, but have you ever read John 3:17-19?

"17For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but to save the world through him. 18Whoever believes in him is not condemned, but whoever does not believe stands condemned already because he has not believed in the name of God's one and only Son. 19This is the verdict: Light has come into the world, but men loved darkness instead of light because their deeds were evil."

I hope this sheds some light on the subject, Jesus is the light of the world.

Now you know, the rest of the story.

Happy Easter!

Smaller is Better

Years ago when I was in college to become a teacher and dating an Iowan, I was impressed with Iowa. Iowa was famous for the high quality of its education. Iowa was known for quality schools, quality teachers, and successful students. Oh that it were still so. Schools are struggling to stay open, good teachers are leaving our profession in droves in hopes of making a better living. Students have taken on a fatalistic attitude, believing that they haven’t got much of a future and if they do, it must be in a bigger city in another state.

Boyer Valley and Maple Valley passed bond issues to build new facilities, but they’re freezing budgets and cutting their staffs and programs. East Monona is facing its extinction. What challenges does Charter Oak-Ute have to face?

The best thing Iowa has always had going for it is size. Smaller is better. There seems to be an idea going around that we should eliminate all Class 1A schools (any under 2-300 students). Some people see the natural evolution being that there should only be one public high school per county.

In California parents are adamantly fighting to reduce class sizes. The idea being that a lower teacher-to-student ration means more individual attention. The Glory of Iowa was the one-room schoolhouse.

In a March 31, 2003 Editorial, the Des Moines Register argued that we could offer students a broader variety of elective courses if the smallest schools were merged into regional Über -schools. Students get lost in huge institutions. Teachers and administrators become bureaucrats.

More students have more opportunity to be involved in more extracurricular activities, in smaller schools. Students who might never have been in Student Government, plays, Band, or Cheer and Drill at a school of over a thousand students are often involved in not just one but two or three of these activities in a school of 200 or less. Athletes who’s ride the bench along with fifty other third-stringers get to be starters at small schools. Simply put, would you rather your child be a little fish in a big pond, or a big fish in a little pond?

Small schools can broaden their offerings in a number of ways. The best could be simply by partnering with our small towns and small businesses. Internships, field trips, workshops, seminars, clinics, work study programs, these are all things that non licensed teachers can offer and if they do, they will benefit as much as the students. Hospitals, nursing homes, caterers, retailers, accountants, manufacturers and machine shops all have something to offer.

Another way would be for neighboring school districts to cooperate with one another. In suburban Phoenix, some schools operate as "magnet" schools. In other words, if there are three schools within so many miles of each other, one may have a great Fine Arts program, (music, drama, etc), another may have the strongest Industrial-Ed program, still another might offer the most advanced computer courses. By coordinating their schedules, students enrolled at one school can shuttle to another to take classes not offered at their own school.

Not to mention the satellite video learning network already in place. Students who’s school only has a French teacher can take Spanish classes in the ICN room (Iowa Communications Network).

The Register made the argument against their own position by accusing proponents of smaller schools of measuring "quality more by dedication of the staff, sense of community and safety, low dropout rates" and better ACT scores.

There is a way to help maintain and maybe even improve small schools. There is legislation in the Statehouse right now that hopes to help get a fairer share of money to smaller schools and cut your property taxes in the process. Many communities fund their schools through property taxes. This leads to serious differences in the quality of school building and resources. In the L.A. area for example, Beverly Hills has much nicer facilities than Compton. It’s not because of segregation, it’s because properties in Beverly Hills are more valuable, so there are higher tax revenues in their school district. Poverty breeds poverty.

House File 626 will level the playing field. After a small increase in state wide sales tax provides property tax relief it’s revenues will go into a pool and distributed to all schools on a per student basis. Advocates claim that this will help guarantee a good education for kids, regardless of their family’s income level, or where they live.

Please write your State Representatives and Senators and ask them to fight and vote for "Infrastructure Equity and Property Tax Relief.

Quotations from millionaire publisher/former U.S. diplomat to France may provide blueprint for nation-building after Iraqi conflict

"How few there are who have courage enough to own their Faults, or resolution enough to mend them!" ~ Ben Franklin, 1743

I admit it, I’m not always right. In the last two columns I alluded to the likelihood that the war with Iraq would go quickly. It looks like my assumption was wrong. Whether it’s because of loyalty to Saddam, fear of Saddam, or resentment of foreign intrusion, not all Iraqis appear to be appreciative of our efforts to liberate them.

In last week’s column I talked about a "sanitized" image we were receiving of the war, that made it look exciting, like a video game.

Since then it has become difficult to watch or even listen to war coverage. Now, I think we’ve been subjected to too much harsh reality. It’s certainly something I’d like to shelter my toddlers from.

As of my writing this last Friday (March 28th), we may still have not found a "smoking gun" that links Saddam Hussein’s regime to Alqueda or September 11, and we may not have uncovered stockpiles of weapons of mass destruction, but we have found pretty condemning circumstantial evidence. There were the thousands of chemical weapon protective suits, why would they need those?

Then there was the mistreatment of American P.O.W.s. Not only was using them for propaganda purposes a violation of the Geneva Convention, but from all appearances, the Iraqis have executed them. If I dragged my feet about going to war, that convinced me that we have no choice now but to finish the job.

According to British military officials, Iraqi paramilitary forces in Basra, in Southern Iraq, fired mortars and machine guns Friday on thousands of civilians trying to leave that besieged city.

Surely after we’ve been there longer, providing aid and food, more Iraqis will warm up to us and realize prefer the devil they don’t know to the one they’ve known for more than two decades.

A greater problem may be the rest of the Islamic world. Winning the peace will be far more complicated than winning the war.

My opinion is that too often, American foreign policy has been like the eagle who dropped a quill. An Indian brave finds the quill and uses it to craft an arrow. Then he shoots the arrow at the eagle. Whether it was supporting despots to contain Communism, oil companies and the CIA meddling in the Iran-Iraq war, the Soviet incursion into Afghanistan or favoring Israel over the Palestinians, we haven’t made a lot of friends in the Middle East over the years.

"He that sows thorns, should never go barefoot." ~ Ben Franklin, 1756.

The aftermath of the Second Gulf War will be a tremendous opportunity to change the way we are viewed in the region and the world..

First of all, we have to bring our European friends and allies back on board. The U.N. is still the best apparatus we have for providing aid and structuring any sort of a government in Iraq. This will also go a long way in restoring our stature throughout the world. At one time Muslims saw us as a bad guy, now seems like everyone does.

"Love your Enemies, for they tell you your Faults." ~Ben Franklin, 1756

The other thing we need to do is stick around and help, no matter the cost.

Today is an important anniversary. On April 3, 1948, President Truman signed the Marshall Plan into law. This program channeled more than $13 billion in aid to Europe between 1948 and 1951. It sparked economic recovery in Europe, devastated by World War II, it also saved the U.S. from a postwar recession by providing a greater market for our goods. The White House estimated the cost of 30 days of war with Iraq at approximately $80 Billion. What would happen if we spent just $20B on food, medicine and shelter for the Iraqis and the Afghans?

According to then Secretary of State George C. Marshall "Our policy (was) directed not against any country or doctrine but against hunger, poverty, desperation, and chaos. Its purpose should be the revival of a working economy in the world so as to permit the emergence of political and social conditions in which free institutions can exist."

President Kennedy had similar aims with his proposals for the Alliance for Progress and the Peace Corps. If we sell people weapons, eventually they’ll use them against us. If we bring them doctors and farming and bridges and dams and canals they will consider us friends rather than bullies.
"Where there is Hunger, Law is not regarded; and where Law is not regarded, there will be Hunger." ~ Ben Franklin, 1755, "Wars bring scars." ~ Ben Franklin, 1745

Reality TV

Now, how I could write a weekly newspaper column without at least commenting on the war. Journalism, after all is the first draft of history. One problem is that we’re just not CNN. I write these things almost a week before you read them.

Last week’s column was in some mailboxes just a few hour before President Bush’s deadline for Saddam Hussein to leave Iraq. As I’m writing this (last Friday, March 21^st) I’m listening to National Public Radio report that the air campaign of "Shock and Awe" is just getting under way. By the time this edition officially is on sale, Thursday, March 27^th, the whole thing may well be over!

I am by no means vehemently opposed to this military solution, in fact I’ll stipulate that Hussein is dangerous and should be removed. I certainly and whole-heartedly support our servicemen and women, but you have to admit that, considering wars throughout history, this one is a little weird. I’ll go further than that and call it down right surreal.

First of all, whoever heard of a "preemptive war?" This is a new invention. One of the reasons so many people, including the French and Germans had (have) such a problem with the war is that in the history of the world, the people who" threw the first punch" were generally considered aggressors. Napoleon, for example.

Generally the "good guys" wait until their hit first before they hit back. John Wayne in "the Quiet Man," for example. I appreciate that 9-11 was a first punch, but it was a sucker punch from somebody other than Iraq. It’s just a little hard for some people to get past.

Then what made it more weird is how long we knew it was coming. In 1991 the first Gulf War was precipitated by several weeks of coalition-building and mobilization as we gave Hussein time to pull out of Kuait, but let’s face it, we’ve all known that this one was coming since last October. The news channels have scheduled their "Showdown with Iraq" shows since the holidays. Doesn’t that strike anyone else as odd? Think about every war from the Spanish American War through Vietnam, sure, in hindsight we can say that there were warning signs that trouble was brewing, but wars generally sneak up on us and surprise ya.

Remember the Maine, the assassination of Archduke Ferdinand, Pearl Harbor, the Gulf of Tonkin?

I’m not accusing the administration of propaganda or the media of profiteering, but you have to admit, we’ve had plenty of time to get used to the idea of going to war..

I think that the weirdest thing of all has to be our being able to watch this as it happens. It’s the ultimate in "reality TV." Frankly, I feel like a voyeur. We’re all given the chance to be "armchair generals."

Think about it, thanks to satellites, we’ve been able to listen to the Iraqi Minister of Information make live statements to the press. The Wednesday night that the war started, we were watching live images of dawn in Baghdad via these traffic or weather cameras. Reporters talk to us from Baghdad itself and from ships in the Gulf and the battlefield itself via their video phones! The ultimate has to be the Tank-cams. It’s better than the dashboard cameras in NASCAR races.

It’s all been too strange. It can’t be natural. During the first Gulf War cynics commented that watching live coverage was like watching a video game. Today video games have cleaner, clearer graphics! Videotape and film of Vietnam had to fly through Hawaii and on to network offices in New York before the gruesome footage made it the "Living Room War."

I appreciate that the Pentagon and White House intend to minimize civilian casualties and that on the one hand war gets TV ratings yet National Security and the safety of our troops necessitates sterilizing the coverage we get to see, but I still think it’s been a bizarre show. I for one feel guilty for watching. Still, like so much reality television, it’s like a hangnail that you can’t leave alone.

I pray that it’s over soon, that we accomplish our objectives, perhaps more importantly, that we succeed in the nation building that will follow, and that this doesn’t come back to bite us like so many of our foreign policy decisions of the last fifty years have. Most of all, I pray that our comfort at home and prowess in battle don’t make it easier for us to wage virtual wars more frequently just because we can.

I am sure that when our new veterans come home they will earnestly tell us that on the ground and in person, war is still Hell, even if it makes good television.

Ah, Spring

Today is the very first day of Spring. Ah spring, when a young man’s fancy turns to thoughts of…

Thoughts of Baseball-

Opening day is just eleven days away, after all.

I was disappointed that my Diamondbacks traded our first baseman Erubiel Durazo to the Oakland A’s, but they gave us Pitcher Elmer Dessens. In spring training he hasn’t given up an earned run in 14 Cactus League games. We’ve needed a number-three starter, anyway.

I understand that our new starting first baseman, Lyle Overbay was hitting .343 in Triple A ball last year. I still like to see Mark Grace on first base, especially after he tried pitching that one game last year!

Of course, there’s still the 1-2 punch of the ‘Back’s big guns Randy Johnson and Curt Schilling. Scouts say that as old as he is, they’ve never seen Johnson as good as he’s been this spring.

I’ve heard that my fellow Shadow Mountain High School Alum, Curt Schilling has been dieting and trying things like aerobics and yoga or tai chi in order to loose some weight. Not that anyone with as many strike outs as him needs to improve that much, but I hear he’s looking at the long haul. He’s been watching Randy and wants to emulate his longevity.

I’ve been trying to get up earlier to spend time on the treadmill and have been cutting back on second-helpings too, since Lent started. Don’t look for too much results-wise until at least the All-Star break!

Of course, there’s also slugger Luis Gonzalez. He’s over his shoulder injury and I think that Barry Bonds had better be ready to defend his record.

Ah spring, when a young man’s fancy turns to thoughts of…

Thoughts of War-

This may be apocryphal, but if you hadn’t heard this one, we’ve won the war even though it hasn’t started yet. Remember last week’s column when I mentioned that Andrew Jackson fought the battle of New Orleans two weeks after the War of 1812 was already over? Well, apparently a while the British were on maneuvers in Kuwait when a group of Iraqi soldiers came rushing across the border waving a white flag and offering to surrender. The Englishmen had to tell them that they’d need to wait a few weeks until the war starts first!

But you know, we may not realize what we’re up against. The Russian newspaper Pravda published a report that Saddam is reverse-engineering an UFO that crashed outside of Baghdad back in 90’s. Pravda reports that aliens are guests at one of Huusein’s palaces. They’ve bio-engineered scorpions the size of cows to serve as guard dogs! I for one would hate to be a U.N. inspector near that palace!

No wonder the Russians didn’t want to vote with the U.S. for a Security Council resolution giving Iraq a deadline that would result in military action. Listen, if it’s in Pravda, it must be true, right. At least we know they’re not a propaganda machine of the USSR anymore, since there is no USSR.

Ah spring, when a young man’s fancy turns to thoughts of…

Thoughts of Summer, of course-

The nicest thing about cold weather, is that kids don’t calmer so much to get outside. Junior high school students are, of course the worst, but the warmer the weather and the more high school students seem to want to be anywhere but in class. It’s not even that I’m ready for school to be out, so much as it seems to get tougher and tougher to focus on getting the young ones to focus now that the windows are open again.

In like a lion, out like a lamb

Is March supposed to come in like a lion, and go out like a lamb? Is the opposite also true- in like a lamb etc.? So, does this idiom apply just to the first day of March, which was pretty pleasant this year, or to the first week or so? Shrove Tuesday brought a blizzard with at least six inches of snow!

Does it apply to things other than the weather? Since we didn’t invade Iraq under the new moon of early March, like some analysts predicted, will we be fighting before the month is out, or will diplomacy continue to dominate the headlines?

Either way, the old adage got me to thinking about almanacs. You know, almanacs, those nifty periodicals full of trivia and fluff that editors of other publications sometimes use as "filler." Some of you may be finally finding one for seasonal advice on your spring selection of buds and bulbs.

I’m always interested in what they say about what’s happened or what’s happening.

For instance, did you know that the Girl Scouts of America was organized 91 years ago yesterday (Wed. 3/12)? Or that this Saturday (3/14) back in 1767 was the birthday of our seventh president, Andrew Jackson? He was the general who won the Battle of New Orleans during the war of 1812, of course that was a couple of weeks AFTER a peach treaty had been signed

Like our current president he faced a close election. In 1824, Congress broke a tie in the Electoral College, giving the presidency to John Quincy Adams, the last son of a president to become president. Jackson came back to wollup Adams in 1828. That ended the "era of good feelings" and the only dominant party of the time, the Democratic-Republicans split into the Democrat’s and some other "Whig" thing or something that eventually would evolve into Lincoln’s Republicans.

Beware of Saturday, it's the "Ides of March," the day Julius Caesar was murdered in the Roman Senate, in 44 B.C. He had been ordered to surrender his power; instead, he crossed the Rubicon river and started a civil war. His arrogance turned Senators against him. According to Shakespeare, Ceasar was warned by a soothsayer that he would die on that day.

There wasn’t really anything special about that day. It turns out that the word "ides" is just a Latin term for the half-way point in the month. The Ides are on the 15th in March, May, July, and October and the 13th in other months. But nobody aver says "beware the ides of April." Probably because April’s ides are on the 13th and most of us fear April 15th more than a trip to the dentist! "Beware the ides od May!" See? It’s just not as scary.

Years ago, before the IRS moved their deadline for filing to April, Americans did fear the ides of March. Jack Benny used to tell a joke about St. Patrick’s Day, "how can you celebrate the wearing of the green, when two days before, the government took it all away from ya." My guess is that it was a dumb joke even back in the 50’s.

My favorite quote attributed to St. Patrick is this, "I was like a stone lying in deep mire, and he that is mighty came and in his mercy, raised me." It’s pretty much a paraphrase of Psalm 40:2 "He lifted me out of the slimy pit, out of the mud and mire; he set my feet on a rock and gave me a firm place to stand."

A pastor once told me that the original Hebrew doesn’t say mire, it says something closer to manure, or malarkey, which are still polite euphemisms for what the Bible really says.

Malarkey is what most Irishmen are full of. There’s another old adage that says "on St. Patrick’s Day, there are two kinds of people in this world, those who are Irish, and those who wish they were." Having survived many an Irish temper at various family gatherings my whole life, I think it ought to be changed to, "there are two kinds of people in this world, those who with they were Irish- and those who know better."

The Old Farmer’s Almanac warned us that our heaviest snowfalls this year would be in early March. Hopefully March will go out like a lamb after all, they say warm with thunderstorms. But you may as well know, they predict that April will be cooler than normal, followed by a warm May.

"A cold April, The Barn will fill." said Ben Franklin ("Poor" Richard Saunders) in his almanac. Not being a farmer, I have no idea what he meant by that. Does it just mean that the animals don’t want to be outside in the cold? Duh. Or does it mean, they’ll all be snuggling and getting romantic because it’s cold, so your livestock will have a lot of offspring?

This week was supposed to be cold with rain and snow showers, next week may bring more rain.

In case you were wondering.

A great place to grow

6 He spreads the snow like wool
and scatters the frost like ashes.
17 He hurls down his hail like pebbles.
Who can withstand his icy blast?
18 He sends his word and melts them;
he stirs up his breezes, and the waters flow.

~Psalm 147: 16-18 (NIV)

Just wanted to give you a little hope that as mean as March may be, this too shall pass and eventually we’ll be mowing the grass!

This is "National Lutheran Schools Week (March 2-8)." The theme this year for Missouri Synod schools is "A Great Place to Grow."

Some of you are wondering why I’m bothering to write about this since some of you are Catholic, Methodist, something else or don’t attend any Church and we don’t really have a Lutheran K-8 in Ute or Charter Oak. The reason I’m bothering is because it’s something very close to my heart, so please give me a chance and read on.

Many of our readers once attended St. John’s Lutheran School in Charter Oak and it left an indelible mark on them. The reason is because it was a great place to grow.

I attended Christ Lutheran School in Phoenix from Kindergarten through eighth grade. I believe that receiving a Christ-centered education gave me solid ethical, intellectual, creative, and social foundation.

Valley Lutheran High was brand new when I was ready for High School, so I didn’t want to take a chance on it,. That may have been a mistake because with 2,600 students Shadow Mountain High School may have been able to offer more programs and resources, but it was unable to offer the individual attention, genuine care and sense of community that Christ Lutheran did.

Because of my work on the school newspaper, in Commercial Art class, and Art Club at S.M., Professor Bill Wolfram of Concordia College in Seward Nebraska recruited me for their Art Department. Seward not only has the best Art program of the ten Concordias nationwide, we have one of the most prestigious departments in the Midwest- even compared to big universities and vocational schools.

Charter Oak seems to have sent a disproportionate number of students to Seward over the years, so the odds favored me finding a spouse from here. Bethany and I got married amidst Charter Oak’s Centennial. After graduation we were called to serve as "Commissioned Ministers of the Gospel: Teachers" at Los Angeles Lutheran Jr/Sr high School.

I admit, at first we felt like God had sent us to Nineveh. Not only did we suffer culture shock, but our apartment was destroyed in the Northridge Earthquake. We were ready to leave before the first year was up, but our pastor there counseled us to tough it out. I’m glad we did.

We didn’t see it as a job, we saw it as a calling, a vocation, a mission and ministry. We didn’t just teach and coach kids, we listened to, cared for, cried with, held, counseled, prayed for and prayed with students from all walks of life. What’s more, our own faiths were nurtured and fed through our fellowship with our fellow faculty members and diverse and dynamic worship opportunities on and off campus. We even saw several students brought to Christ and baptized during our weekly Chapel services.

This year we’re facing some milestones. Because we have been teaching in public schools now for three years, the Church has taken our names of it’s official roster of commissioned teachers. L.A. Lutheran is celebrating it’s 50th anniversary, and the last group of student we taught there will be graduating this May.

I don’t know much about Zion Lutheran Elementary in Denison. I do know that it means a lot to me that my daughter Grace is not just learning about letters and colors at Noah’s Ark Pre-School, she is also learning about Jesus’ love for her and how He wants us to love each other.

If the proponents of "bigger is better" ever get their way and we eliminate all the 1A and 2A high schools in Iowa, I hope and pray that the Churches of our communities will consider cooperating in the establishment of a Christian Charter School in Charter Oak.

Martin Luther supported the concept of universal education because he believed that everyone should be taught to read. He believed everyone should read be taught to read so that they can read the Bible for themselves, so that each person can know a personal relationship with the Lord. Whether it’s in a Lutheran, Catholic, or Public School or home schooling, I can think of nothing more important than education.

Please consider contributing to a Lutheran school. It’s tax deductible. Go to www.dcs.lcms.org/school/info.html to find out more. Even if you never take the opportunity to support a Lutheran school financially, PLEASE, encourage your children to value their education no matter what kind of school they go to. And please support their teachers and administrators, support them with prayer, with respect, with time, with your vote, and with appreciation, no matter what kind of school they teach in.