Finally coming down off the sugar high

Finally coming down off the sugar high
Charter Oak-Ute NEWSpaper Schleswig Leader, Thursday, November 9, 2006 Page 3

Last week, of course was Halloween. I had at least a couple of students tell me on Monday, not to expect them to be in school on Wednesday, because they knew they’d be out late on Halloween.

I rolled my eyes and asked if they were between the ages of three and ten. My implication being that trick or treating is really meant for little kids. Responsible adults attend their costume parties the weekend before, pretty much only hoodlums and occultists find it necessary to be out late on Halloween.

Our nine year old nephew decided that he was too old to run around in a silly costume this year, he’d rather help his Grandpa harvest corn. For some reason, when people hit 14 they decide it’s cool to dress up and behave silly again.

Tuesday afternoon at junior high cheerleading practice, as the girls were reviewing chants they’d just learned, our new junior high mascot asked if he could visit the campus day care and surprise the children during their Halloween party. I thought it was a sweet idea, so I gave my permission and off he went.

I should’ve known better, I should’ve warned him or given him a quick training session.
There was no in between. Kids had only two kinds of reactions. A few stormed him as they might Santa Claus- he got tackled and wrestled and roughed up by one group of children,
It was the other group of children that was the real problem. They were so frightened and inconsolable about the big grey bulldog that he eventually had to take his head off and speak gently to them so that they’d know he wasn’t a monster. This of course violated the mascot’s cardinal rule to never break character or reveal your secret identity, but it was the only solution.

A colleague of mine reminisced two days in a row about the pranks and acts of vandalism that kids used to commit in his town, relieved that doesn’t happen so much any more, half hoping that it wouldn’t.

I did spy a pair of teens dragging a trash barrel up a hill as we brought out children home around eight o’clock. I was worried that they were up to no good, but we soon found out what they were up to.

As we unloaded our costumed candy-consumers, we heard a blood-curdling noise in the distance. They were racing the trash barrels down the hill, like sleds without snow.

“At risk behavior?” Maybe, but certainly not malevolent or malicious.

It was just one more way that Halloween is different than it was in the Phoenix suburb where I grew up. Several of the kids on the block all met at one kids house, took pictures and started out walking around the block. We’d end the night on a cul-de-sac where one family had set up a haunted house in their garage. 8-10 year olds sometimes served as chaperons for 5-7 year olds. Parents really only accompanied the 2-4 year olds.

Some parents made their kids bring light sweatshirts or jackets, but most kids stuffed them in their candy bags so as not to ruin their costumes. Most of the time, the polyester costumes over your jeans and long sleeve shirt made you monstrously hot.

You know you’re from Iowa when your parents buy costumes two sizes too big so that you can fit it OVER your heavy winter coat and gloves.

My wife and sister-in-law and I must be major wimps because we decided that instead of walking all night, we should shuttle the kids around in a minivan with it’s heater blasting.

When we took pictures of our 8 year old renaissance princess, our four year old pumpkin, and our 20 month old “Mary Moo-Cow,” I was reminded more of Jean Shepherd’s “The Christmas Story,” than Halloween. Particularly when his little brother is so bundled up that when he falls down, he can’t get back up.

The Princess looked walked like a penguin, the pumpkin didn’t need any stuffing to be round and the cow looked like a inflated car air bag, only with a Holstein pattern.

She HATED having her costume put on over her coat, but she was certainly excited and proud once it was on.

“Go bye bye now?” Yes sweetie, let’s go trick-or-treating. “Treat? Cream?” No, honey, no ice cream, just candy. “Crayondee?” Not Crayons, CANDY. “Crayansd?”
At our first stop, she wanted my attention as soon as we were out of the van.
“DA-ad?” Yes kiddo?
“Meeeyeow!” Everyone giggled.
No, no sweety, you’re not a kitty, you’re a cow. Can you say MOOO?
Her sisters and cousin all started mooing until they got up to the door.

I had to appreciate stopping at our kid’s baby-sitter’s house for pictures. Paul Bockelman offered us chips and homemade salsa.

Thursday morning, Ellen, the 4 year old pumpkin told us that she’d been dreaming about candy.

“Those dreams are supposed to be for Christmas Eve, “ her mother told her. Sugar-plumbs and all that.

I think if I’d been sneaking treats from my tick-or-treat bucket every hour for the past 72 hours like her, I’d be having nightmares about candy.

Sure enough,
“Daddy, my tummy aches.”
Oh, why do you think that is, Hon.
"Too much Halloween."