'Cause I Got High'

Is our President still using cocaine? I don't know, that may be nothing more than a wild conspiracy theory. I do suspect that he's what psychologists call a "Dry Drunk," that is an addict who may not be using, but never deals with the underlying emotional and mental problems that motivated them to abuse drugs or alcohol. Dry Drunks operate in a perpetual deeply pathological state.

One recovery website describes Dry Drunk Syndrome this way:

This lack of sober realism manifests itself in many ways.

1. Grandiosity, put very simply, is an exaggeration of one's own importance. This can be demonstrated either in terms of one's strengths or weaknesses. In either case it is blatantly self- seeking or self-serving, putting oneself at the center of attention, from the "big me" who has ask the answers to the "poor me" whose cup of self-pity runneth over and wants all of our attention.

2. Judgmentalism is mutually related to grandiosity. It means that the alcoholic is prone to make value judgments - strikingly inappropriate evaluations - usually in terms of "goodness" or "badness".

3. Intolerance leaves no room for delaying the gratification of personal desires. This is accomplished by gross confusion of priorities with the result that a mere whim or passing fancy is mistakenly given more importance than genuine personal needs.

4. Impulsivity is the result of intolerance or the lack of ability to delay gratification of personal desires. Impulsivity describes behavior which is heedless of the ultimate consequence for self or others.

5. Indecisiveness is related to impulsitivity in the sense that while the latter takes no realistic account of the consequences of the actions, the former precludes effective action altogether. Indecisiveness stems from an unrealistic exaggeration of the negative possibilities of the action ; so one wavers between two or more possible courses of action, more times than not- nothing gets done.

That's pretty serious stuff, so let's try to cope with living in a dysfunctional America with humor! It's one way that the children of abusers act out in school, by being class clown. Maybe this will help. Here are the lyrics to a hilarious hip-hop parody being played by a number of Liberal talk radio hosts (may as well laugh, if we don't we'll just cry):

Bushman - 'Cause I Got High'

I wasn't gonna score me no dope, to get me high,
I wasn't gonna drive while giggling drunk... I got high.
Man, I wasn't gonna inhale skunk! No, that is a lie!
'Cause I got high,
'Cause I got high,
'Cause I got high.

I coulda been a fighter pilot once, but I got high.
A big chief in the National Guard, but I got high.
Now - man! I couldn't fly a kite, and I know why:
- 'Cause I got high,
'Cause I got high,
'Cause I got high.

I wasn't gonna campaign for Pres, but I got high.
I can't fix a whole sentence together, 'cause I got high.
Now I ain't no better than that pothead Clinton, hope you know why:
'Cause I got high,
'Cause I got high,
'Cause I got high.

I was gonna sign Kyoto, I swear, but I got high,
I was gonna clean my cowboy act up, but I got high.
It was a slight ambitious misjudgment, and I know why:
'Cause I got high,
'Cause I got high,
'Cause I got high.

I was gonna bomb Pyongyang, I said, high as the sky.
Show those slit-eyed commies who's da boss, but I got high.
Now bombs are gonna wipe ME out, and I know why
- 'Cause I got high,
'Cause I got high,
'Cause I got high.

I guess I'm gonna stop toking dope, tell you why:
I'm gonna kick my brown-nugget drugs habit, if I die.
When I'm impeached and I'm washing dishes, hope you know why:
- 'Cause I got high,
'Cause I got high,
'Cause I got high.

Gee! I buggered-up the whole world, 'cause I got high
On copious blow, I lost the plot, 'cause I got high.
Now I'm piped off my stoopid face giggling... I know why:
- 'Cause I got high, 'cause I got high, 'cause I got high,
'Cause I'm high, 'cause I'm high, 'cause I'm high.